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Redirecting those big love bucks |
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Is there a Valentine’s Day naysayer akin to Christmas’s Grinch? Surveys tell us that the amorous shell out billions of dollars for Feb. 14. It’s the third costliest holiday on the calendar. Know this: consumer surveys report that recipients really aren’t that keen on tokens of affection like furry handcuffs, “love coupon” books, paid (as opposed to impromptu, amateur) holiday serenades, or yes, those standbys like boxes of chocolate or other candies, and many arrangements of flowers. Maybe try a change-up, strengthening a relationship in ways that experts say are proven — just doing different stuff together and finding meaning and purpose in mutual undertakings? But why not start the morning by taking a little of that Valentine loot and buying books for kids and donating them and reading them aloud at a welcoming daycare center or shelter? Or maybe spend part of the Valentine’s weekend volunteering together in a food bank, or visiting friends or family who are caregivers or shut-ins (see the other sidebar)? The December newsletter offered suggestions for donating to those with medical or health needs — why not revisit the options and see if they might delight a sweetie more than, say, a glob of unneeded calories? The year had barely started when gales and raging wildfires made thousands homeless and bereft in Southern California. Thousands are still recovering from end-of-the year hurricanes and floods. Conflicts around the globe have only heightened the need for aid. And the need is unceasing for those who can help — on everything from the unhoused to abandoned animals. |
Caring for our unpaid caregivers |
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Tens of millions of people across the country would love to enjoy a night out with a special Valentine. They can’t, though. That’s because as many as 100 million Americans provide desperately needed, too often unpaid, care for loved ones or friends, according to studies by the RAND Corp. As researchers from the Santa Monica, Calif., think tank wrote in a recent online post: “If the U.S. government paid caregivers for every hour they spend providing this care, it would cost well over $100 billion. But caregivers also have a lot on their shoulders. Many are working, but due to their caregiving responsibilities, many caregivers have to cut back their work hours, switch jobs, or leave the labor force altogether. Our estimates suggest that these disruptions cost caregivers approximately $5,000 in household income per year. “These caregivers also have emotional needs. Many tell us that they are excessively stressed, sometimes in surprising ways. For example, many caregivers help arrange care from a distance, visiting the individual a few times per week or per month. Our research reveals that these caregivers are even more stressed than those who provide most of their care in-person.” The Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health studied federal data and found that “millions of young Americans between the ages of 15 and 22 are providing essential care to adults, significantly impacting those young people’s educational opportunities and achievements.” In a recent online post, the researchers noted: “[Y]outh caregivers are more likely to be non-white, with a nearly equal distribution of male and female caregivers, contrasting with the predominance of female caregivers in the adult population. The study also highlights that both youth and young adult caregivers face educational disadvantages … They are less likely to be enrolled in school and spend significantly less time on educational activities, which may have long-term implications for their educational attainment and economic stability.” For caregivers, it is not only the loss of education, work, money, time, and freedoms, the burdens of their responsibilities can be crushing due to the isolation they experience, the New York Times has reported. Family and friends mean well, but they forget caregivers. They lose touch and rarely call, perhaps out of fear of embarrassment about the diminished circumstances of loved ones, friends, and colleagues with physical or mental debilitation. While celebrating a holiday dedicated to love, spread a little to caregivers, please. Give them a call. See if they need anything, especially a chance to get out for even a bit. Maybe you or yours can give them a respite and provide a nonjudgemental ear for a cup of tea or coffee. Caregivers would appreciate the effort, the newspaper has reported. Think, too, about other shut-ins or those who don’t get the regular acknowledgement that they deserve — teachers, first responders, those in the military. And what ever happened to the societal gratitude for “essential workers?” Let Cupid empty his quiver for all the positive vibes that can be spread on February 14. |
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